Call The Friggin' Election Already

Respect to our fearless leader John Winston Howard, but call this Aussie Federal election ASAP. Getting a bit worried here that the longer he leaves it before calling the election I will not have enough time to:

1. Decide whether the Greens Drug policies make more or less sense than they did last time. Won't affect my vote, but will provide some comic relief, we need fringe parties after all, though I'm still waiting for the Fringe Benefits. My advice to Bob Brown and the rest of the greens, get a gig at the Adelaide Fringe Festival, the Fringe Festival has become more mainstream, the same might be possible for you;
2. Not be able to assess the free stuff hey offer. The last few elections have provided the first home buyers grant, the baby bonus, and this election promises solar power and water tank benefits. Call the election already so i can assess my free shit options. Aint pickin' a side til i know what's in it for me;
3. Figure out whether we actually have an Australian Labour, or are they trying to steal the Nationals seats in the Coalition. Stop agreeing with each other dammit, show us what you got, at the moment it's a choice between more of the same, and um steering the same tried and tested course;
4. Plan that weekend bender. Of course every weekend is a bender, hence i need as much notice to ensure that i can bend around the requirement to vote.