Election Priorities

How are all you Aussies out there doin'.

Getting ready for the big election fight no doubt. I'm excited, I call it "free sh*t time", not election time. The names and faces might change, I don't care, as long as I get my "free sh*t".

Thinking I might start a family soon so I can get this baby bonus thing, buy a house so I can get a grant, and if labor gets in, I can fit it with solar panels, water tanks and other green initiatives to power my subterranean bunker in the event the big one gets dropped. In defence they think of nu-cular bombs as a whole lot of sunshine, so looking on the bright side, when the big one comes, I'll be able to power my bunker for months, based on the one surge that melts my solar panels, and then emerge into a world that is finally free of Capitalism, Globalisation, Overpopulation and Newcastle Knights supporters. It pays to, in the words of "Lord Baden Powell" Be Prepared! Of course this utopia will probably have other problems, like global hunger, poverty, disease (new exciting post nu-cular super viruses and bacteria), but at least we will have licked this whole Global Warming thing, which is the important thing, isn't it?!

Do you get the baby bonus if you adopt, or do I actually have to hold someones hand whilst she delivers our little bundle of lifetime expenses and commitment? Might be worth looking into!

All The Way With JFK, I Mean Kev 07

You, are gonna love this, whereas I on other hand am wearing my devil's advocate hat.

http://www.kevin07.com.au/

On his webpage where he talks about Global Warming/Climate Change, which are interchangeable, according to Kevvie, he has this to say

Climate change is the most pressing challenge we face in the new century. The effects of global warming are already hurting Australia, adding to the current drought. Yet we face even hotter and drier summers, the coral bleaching of the Great Barrier Reef, the loss of our snow fields, increasing droughts, less water for our cities and an increase in the number of devastating bushfires.

How he forgot to add "the disappearance of a random number of my black socks, some cheese going mouldy in my fridge and the fact that I have not had a date in over six month to the plethora of things attributable to Global Warming/Climate change is beyond me. But I suppose we are allowed to have differing priorities.

Did you know John Howard has had secret plans for 25 Nuclear Power stations from 1968, it's on the map therefore it must be true. Anyway, not entirely happy with those selected locations, so i have come up with a few alternates that require further investigation, the beauty of course of my selections is that there aren't any in Melbourne (I still call Melbourne, I still call Melbourne home), and there aren't any in Adelaide where i currently live:

1. LOCATION: SPRINGFIELD, NSW POSTCODE: 2250
2. LOCATION: SPRINGFIELD, NSW POSTCODE: 2630
3. LOCATION: SPRINGFIELD, VIC POSTCODE: 3434
4. LOCATION: SPRINGFIELD, VIC POSTCODE: 3531
5. LOCATION: SPRINGFIELD, QLD POSTCODE: 4300
6. LOCATION: SPRINGFIELD LAKES, QLD POSTCODE: 4300
7. LOCATION: SPRINGFIELD, QLD POSTCODE: 4871
8. LOCATION: SPRINGFIELD, SA POSTCODE: 5062
9. LOCATION: SPRINGFIELD, WA POSTCODE: 6525
10. LOCATION: SOUTH SPRINGFIELD, TAS POSTCODE
11. LOCATION: SPRINGFIELD, TAS POSTCODE: 7260

Springfield, the ultimate Nuclear Power plant waste dump site. And since i don't live anywhere near Spring field it officially becomes "Somebody Else's Problem", which of course is the best kind. Anyway, I have up until the election to start myself a little family. Might even invest in one of those instant family things, just add money (Like Madonna is doing in Malawi), although i am not sure you can adopt a wife. Once i have a family I will be well placed to take advantage of the:

$10,000 to help up to 200,000 families invest in solar and practical water and energy savings devices.

rebates of up to $500 for around 500,000 households across Australia to install rainwater tanks or grey water pipes.

They'll also receive a free "Green Renovations" pack which includes a water-efficient shower head and energy-efficient light globes.

I personally can't wait, if you add up $10,000 for green initiatives, $500 rebates for my household, the baby bonus for my instant family, first home buyers grant and energy efficient light bulbs, I am gonna be a multi-millionaire. This time next year i will definitely know what Truffles are, and how to spell "Fwois Grass" The light bulbs will definitely be a hit, I am sure Bunnings did it once, and they certainly know how to suck people in. By the way, did not all those grants i just mentioned get dreamed up during an election period. If we had more elections i could be a rich man.

There is just one thing that puzzles me, does this classify as an election stunt as part of the Stunt Election of 2007. Gonna have to watch the news this week, it ain't an election stunt until some politician/reporter calls it one.

kevin07